Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Bed bugs are the bane of my existence. In my traveling world, at least. They are not a myth, they are not microscopic as common misconception suggests, but they are very much real and they are following me around the world. This time to Malaysia. These pesky creepy crawlies are small, elusive, and extremely difficult to both detect and be rid of. The live strictly by feeding on the blood of humans, my blood, and they feed only at night, actually closer to dawn is prime chow time. Something like 10% of the world is allergic to bed bugs. And I am unfortunately EXTREMELY allergic to them. Having being bitten and suffered through three prior attacks, I now travel with some Oliviaesque precautionary measures. Regardless of the temperature, I will go to bed the first night in a new place fully clothed, with only the flesh around my eyes exposed, and if I have no bites the next day, I’ll sleep comfortably the next night and onwards. There have been times where I’ve completely coocooned myself in a sheet and tied elastic bands on the ends to stop the bugs from getting in. I don’t even believe I’m being at all dramatic. Keeping in my traveling tradition, I slept fully clothed my first night in KL and awoke the next day seemingly alright. Then, that eve was New Years and I came home fairly…indisposed, ahem.  I was so drunk I actually saw a bed bug, said ‘Ew look a bug!’, flicked it off the bed and passed out. I woke up with bites all over my body, and even after changing rooms twice, I spent two more nights being midnight snacked upon, total bites adding up to somewhere around 70. These aren’t just little mosquito bites, they are welts, blisters, and boil like to be more accurate. It’s disgusting and ruins my life, as well the persons whom I am traveling with since it’s impossible to not sulk over.  They are itchy, painful, and last for weeks. And they send me to the hospital every time.

I’ve read that things like eucalyptus oil and bathing before bed will help repel them, and duct taping the bottom of the bedposts, or even creating a barrier of duct tape around your body, can help stop them from tromping all over your body while you sleep. All things I am incorporating into my traveling routine. Any other ideas?

With what time I didn’t spend hindered by my ails, I got over myself and did a bit of exploring.

I had not a clue that Malaysia was so Muslim. I have never been within such a predominantly Muslim population before. 60 percent of the population are Muslim, 19 percent are Buddhist, 9 percent are Christian and 6 percent are Hindu. It can be rather intimidating to two white girls in sundresses. There is a distinct Islamic touch in the contemporary architecture of the many buildings towering over the otherwise lower class communities. The iconic Petronas Towers, which were the tallest buildings in the world until Taipei 101 took over that title in 2004, dominate the skyline and are symbolic to Malaysia’s stance in the modern day world.

Kuala Lumpur wasn’t the most memorable city I’ve visited. Although I may be slightly partial due to my shortcomings, there was no apparent charm in the vibe that attracts me to some cities, nor warmth from the people, or fascination in the culture. Though it is an incredibly cultured city, perhaps over cultured. There is a large international population, people from India, China, and all over South East Asia, as well as a large number of westerns, that have made Kuala Lumpur home and tourists are surprisingly plenty. We spent some time in the chic malls, although mainly just to hunt for fast food chains we’ve been missing in Taiwan, but opted for more daytime adventures out of the city center and into Chinatown, Little India, and a neighborhood called Chow Kit, one more sinister than welcoming. Nothing much to see, no lasting impressions, but with the primary purpose of this trip being to party, party is what we did.

We rung in the New Year with the Bloody Beetroots at the Life Center in KL. They were, as expected, amazing. This Italian electro duo was especially hard to meet, but alas we got to chat for a minute, coaxing them hard on playing Taiwan in 2010. 6 inch purple heels had me hobbling the next day, but by the following night, feet wrapped tight in moccasins, we danced to the Basement Jaxx. AND THEY DIDN’T EVEN PLAY RED ALERT!

The Bloody Beetroots

The Basement Jaxx

I know this guy in Montreal who runs this little dive spot I fancy in the Plateau called Cash and Carry and he serves the best gd Malaysian food my palette has ever been treated too. Curries, lambs, muscles..I had high hopes for culinary delicacies in KL. Yet I found myself indulging in all that I eat everyday, Chinese food and sushi. But I have this thing I do in every city I visit, to try the one offbeat thing on the menu at McDonalds that is local to the country I’m in. I should have documented (and remembered) more of these wacky snacks as it’s all the same in North America. The Philippines has McSpaghetti, Thailand has a McSamurai burger and broccoli pie, and KL’s menu included milkshakes, curly fries, and a Prosperity burger…a burger full of wealthy fillings like onions and a pepper sauce.

Thailand in 20 days…